Friday, January 21, 2011

Tying Up Loose Ends

Hello, my followers! I have an update for you, as I said I would! So without further adieu, here we go!

For some time now, I have been waiting for my moment to strike. I think of the time spent wasted on my other adventures. Fun, and interesting places I have gone and seen, but this whole time, there has been a squirrel on the loose.
A super evil squirrel too. Nothing that cute can be good.
He must die for this.
Alone, I know not what to do.
But this time, I've got a whole crew of pirates at my disposal.
But wait, let me backtrack for a moment. We never did have resolution to my last adventure.



So yes, my crew and I were on the heels of the Sea Shephards. We were ready to drop those whale huggers to the bottom of the sea. Unfortunately, word had gotten back to the rest of the world of our exploits, and sadly, the Navy was not pleased. Any of them, but we happened to get the Russian Navy. Some time later, before we caught up with the Sea Shephards, we were closed in on by the Russian Navy, and had our boat confiscated, and were taken back to the US. Awesomely, because we weren't human, there is no punishment for piracy done by animals, so we were free to go. I figure, hey, we can probably get into more trouble on land than on the sea anyways, so they all came to live with me. Now, Mom and Dad don't know about this, but they are the ones living upstairs that Daddy complains about constantly. Daddy says he wants to stop on the ceiling in his boots. He really dislikes the upstairs noise. Well, that's my crew. I've been able to crawl out the window and up one of the trees at night to go and be with them, so will soon be ready to strike. Maybe now that I have Vicious Frank on my crew, Frank the Neighbor will trust me. One can only hope. But that's my plan, anyways.

Now being home, things have seemed to settle down some. I got my job at Hooters back. For some reason, guys really like hairy boobs, and well, I've got 6 of them. So I make pretty good money just in tips alone. I thought about getting Neptunes Revenge a job with me, but I figured that it would just be someone to steal my tips away, and well, we can't have that. Dad hates the fact I work there. He's tried to call and have me quit several times so far. But I told the manager that hes a senile relative, so the manager just disregards the calls. Now he thinks I just work at Starbucks, so it works out. I've got an avid tipper that always gives me Starbucks gift cards. I think he may be in love with me or something. Whatever it is you humans do. One day I was getting ready for work, and Mom caught me.



So now, I'm grounded again. Not fun. I want to go out and wreak havoc in this fine community. So for now, I guess that's all. Since I'm grounded though, I imagine I will have more time to write, lolz. We will see. I think its time to get our card game together, and I'm sure beyond any doubt that Frank my Neighbor, will be sure to come.



Ta ta for now!

1 comment:

  1. Ha ha. So glad you came back. I thought you were lost in the South Pacific- maybe on a deserted island. Home is better. At least there they feed you good. You don't have to eat lizards and stuff.

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